there's hope ...

No matter what is going on in world affairs, we still have more in common with each other than not. Check out this video of some guy named Matt dancing a silly dance with people all over the world, ranging from indigenous New Guinea dudes in full tribal regalia to Japanese schoolgirls. It's a real slice of humanity, and I bet it will bring a smile to your face.

http://www.vimeo.com/1211060

get service

loved this kinda cheesy yet poignant YouTube video:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=LfeXxkbgCVE

chokes me up every time ...

what's playing in my head today

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zN9vd9WUiA

Drive
by Incubus

love these lyrics!!

oh! I just found an acoustic version that's even better!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpwsuhOUAkk&feature=related

happy virus

after my moments of personal angst have come and gone, I settle in once more to my natural state of being, which Hafiz perfectly expresses for me here:


The Happy Virus

I caught the happy virus last night

When I was out singing beneath the stars.

It is remarkably contagious -

So kiss me.



from The Subject Tonight Is Love - 60 Wild and Sweet Poems of Hafiz

translations by Daniel Ladinsky

swimming

listened to the June Abraham-Hicks CD this morning, and felt like they were talking directly to me. I've been swimming in grace again lately, after forgetting for a while that I could dip into that pool anytime I wanted to. Now that I say that, I wonder if it it is true that I forgot, really. It feels like more of a natural sort of rhythm, like the in breath and out breath. Forgetting is really not any better than remembering ... it's just part of the cycle. So it's okay.

Anyway, my neck and shoulders are still wracked from being rear-ended, but the therapists that are working with me are simply amazing, and I know I am in good hands. Opportunities for personal and professional expansion are everywhere I look, and what's super cool that I'm really grateful for is that I seem to be able to feel through the many gifts I have been given lately and tap into the Benevolent Giver that is the source of them all.

So when I hear the perfect song on the radio, I know it's not that I need to listen to that station or DJ forever -- they were just the vehicle through which the gift was delivered to me at that moment. And rather than fixating on the packaging, I've been able to enjoy the essence of the gift with gratitude, without grasping on to it, because I know that the Source of all these gifts has infinite delivery methods at its disposal. Not that there's anything wrong with grasping - it's all okay. It's just that this level of detachment and trust is a new and cool thing for me.

Oh, and you all, dear readers, are part of the delivery system! For the first time since I started blogging, I am now aware that people are coming here looking to see if I've written anything. And while that doesn't change the fact that sometimes I have nothing to say (or I'd rather be out at the pool than in here at my keyboard), it does inspire me to check in with myself more often to see if anything wants to come forth. So hey, thanks for being my muses!

bonus summer dvd rental recommendation: Lars and the Real Girl. it was wacky and sweet and out there, and a touching illustration of the internal joy that results from loving others as well as giving them the benefit of the doubt. I enjoyed it immensely.

gee-tar

could I be the only person on the planet who did not know that you could take guitar lessons on youtube? thank you, anonymous commentary person. your name will go down in infamy with my neighbors for giving me the link to Here Comes the Sun, which led me in two clicks to a much easier starter song, Breathe by Anna Nalick, which I will now play obsessively until my fingers bleed or someone yells at my window to shut up, whichever comes first.

Here's my youtube teacher for today. He's exactly my speed. This is so exciting! Now I can play two tunes, Other Side of the World by KT Tunstall, and this one. woo hoo!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=xPlWlemhAQQ&feature=related

the nudge

I got rear-ended in a minor fender bender last week. My car had only the teensiest bit of damage, but it's amazing how strongly my neck is reacting to that little love tap!

I've been blessed with good people at every stage of the process. The woman who hit me was compassionate and kind, and sent me to her massage therapist the very next day. He is nothing short of a miracle worker with magic hands, and I instantly pledged my unmitigated devotion and became a client for life. (If you live anywhere near Louisville, CO, I'd urge you call him immediately, except that I hope he doesn't get so busy that I can't see him when I want to! Jeremy at Louisville Massage Center, downtown on Main St. 303 665 2563)

The claims adjuster has been nothing but helpful, and my chiropracter is working with her to bill them directly. (Since I'm on a referring roll today: Dr. Joel Fry at Elite Chiropractic) So it's all been virtually seamless.

It's funny, I know some folks who would think having an accident meant they were somehow vibrationally out of alignment. They might look for metaphorical significance in it; take it as a sign of something needing to be fixed in their lives.

But I'm getting a kick out of a very different interpretation - that the accident is nothing more and nothing less than an opportunity to connect with myself and my fellow earthmates in new and interesting ways. Exactly the same kind of opportunity that comes my way every day -- in line at the grocery store, or with the person who bumps into me in a crowd. Wait .... there's a song about this! .... oh yeah! Peter Gabriel. The time I like is the rush hour, cos I like the rush. The pushing of the people - I like it all so much. Such a mass of motion - do not know where it goes. I move with the movement and ... I have the touch.

Well, I bet that will be playing in my head for hours now, if not days. But earlier today I found myself repeating the phrase I read in an article a long time ago by Alan Cohen:

Thank you for everything. I have no complaint whatsoever.

And it was true. Ahh, the grace of it all!

today's journey (so far)

started with my friend debra's blog ...
http://reachdabbleshine.typepad.com/28yearslater/

.... where I read about Joan Tollifson, who I then googled and enjoyed immensely ...
http://home.earthlink.net/~wakeupjt/rcommndd.htm

... and on her recommended reading list was Wayne Liquorman, whose Ram Tzu book is a favorite on my bookshelf that I haven't read in ages ...
http://advaita.org/AFwayne.htm

...which somehow reminded me of a poem I have kept in the front of my daytimer for about ten years now ...

Be like a bird
Who halting in her flight
On a limb too slight
Feels it give way beneath her
Yet sings
Sings
Knowing she has wings.

So I googled it, and it turns out to be the words to a song, adapted from a poem by Victor Hugo. Who knew? And it's not even 10 am yet ...

visual bliss

At a friend's birthday party tonight, I sat near a guy who mentioned that he was a photographer. You know how I like to google everything, so of course I had to come home and investigate his work online. I am stunned speechless by the, umm ... gorgeousity ... of this man's work. See, that's not even a real word. I told you I was speechless. You will be too.

I just paused for a moment to tell you about him, and now I am going right back to his site to be transported and transformed.

I think lunar is my very favorite category so far.
http://www.steelephoto.com/photo.php?set_id=4

Or is it Flatirons?
http://www.steelephoto.com/photo.php?set_id=2

Oh, I dunno. Do yourself a favor and look at all of them.
http://www.steelephoto.com/index.php

If you feel inspired to use his contact form to tell him how much you enjoyed his work, go for it. He seems like a very decent and humble guy, from what I can tell, and I bet he'd be happy to hear from you. And feel free to pass his site along - it's like a mini online retreat.

If you live near Boulder, I think I heard him say he has a show at the Boulder Public Library gallery for another week or so. His name is Peter Steele.

morning pages

okay, I'm converted! since I started writing three pages every morning when I wake up, I've been remembering dreams like crazy. And as I write them down, I almost always get one of those ah-ha experiences where it feels like one part of me sent a message to another part, and it was received. Very cool.

Perhaps coincidentally, perhaps not, I'm noticing that since I started journaling every day, my attention has been gravitating toward physical matters. I've been eating more fruits and vegetables and taking walks every day since I started, without even trying. That's a bonus I did not anticipate ... seems that when my mind is freed up from obsessive thinking, it wants to use the extra time and attention to care for my body.

I started Pilates this week, and I love it! I highly recommend my instructor, Desiree, at the Pilates Center in Boulder. I was pretty nervous about it, and she was amazingly reassuring and supportive as she competently led me through the exercises. I left that first session feeling stronger already, and aware of muscles I didn't know I had (in a good way). Read more about her here: http://www.thepilatescenter.com/about/instructors.cfm?insid=6

convincing

this daily quote from alancohen.com really struck a chord with me:

If you know something is true, you don't need to convince anyone of it. If you are trying to convince anyone, it is probably yourself. -- Alan Cohen

today's abraham quote

Be easy about this. Be playful about it. Don't work so hard at it. Let your dominant intent to be to feel good, and if you don't feel good, then let your dominant intent be to feel relief. Feel your way through it. If you think your way through it, you can get off on all kinds of tangents. If you feel your way through it, you can come quickly to your Core Energy, and when you do that only good can then flow to you.

Excerpted from a workshop in Rye, NY on Sunday, October 12th, 1997

All Is Well

www.abraham-hicks.com

psycho valentine candy hearts

this made me laugh until my stomach hurt ...
http://www.despair.com/bittersweets.html

book recos

I'm in an input phase. Came home from the library yesterday with an armful of books and did not get up from the recliner until many hours later. Sometimes I love to just disappear inside the covers of a book and not come out again until it's over. Luckily, my kids are old enough to get their own meals, and I read pretty quickly.

Devoured Julia Cameron's autobiography, Floor Samples. I never got around to reading The Artist's Way, although I've heard wonderful things about it. But I trust those book spines that call so clearly to me from their shelves, so I brought home the biography of a woman I knew nothing about. Whew, what a whirlwind of a life!

Even though I don't feel even remotely creatively blocked, I feel inspired to try The Morning Pages - three pages written every morning stream-of-consciousness style. Still haven't decided whether I want to write with a keyboard or pen. If you haven't heard about this technique, you can read the scoop at www.theartistsway.com in the Tools tab.

Also read The God Theory by Bernard Haisch. My mind is still reeling from the implications of this book. Much of it I'd heard before from a metaphysical rather than scientific perspective. One concept in particular really packs a whallop for me. I'll probably botch this explanation up, so if you are at all interested, make sure to read the book.

You know how a slide projector with no slide in it just projects white light, which actually contains every possible color? Then you put the slide in, and it filters out various colors in the spectrum so that all that remains for us to see on the screen is the blue of the sky or the red of the tablecloth.

Haisch hypothesizes that our brains create our experiences by filtering out various bits of information from the white light that contains absolute potential (God). This concept of the brain as filter or reducer rather than a creator blows me away.

It supports our current model of the 'use it or lose it' biology of the brain. It explains why newborns are able to recognize every sound in every human language, but within months can no longer recognize sounds that are not part of the language that is spoken around them. Maybe what we call socialization is simply the cultural training of our offsprings' filters!

This also explains how autistic savants might have such stunning abilities - their filters are "damaged", and the crack allows them access to more potential than our "normal" filters do. Okay, I think I better go get the book here:

If you think of the white light as a metaphor of infinite, formless potential, the colors on a slide or frame of film become a structured reality grounded in the polarity that comes about through intelligent subtraction from that absolute formless potential. It results from the limitation of the unlimited. I contend that this metaphor provides a comprehensible theory for the creation of a manifest reality (our universe) from the selective limitation of infinite potential (God).
...
I also argue that the individual consciousness comes about through this same process. Our minds are filtered from the mind of God. Our thoughts are filtered from the thoughts of God.

I resonate deeply with his idea that we are all little bits of God, wearing masks that make us forget who we really are so we can have physical experiences for the fun of it. I think the Hindus call this Lila -- the play of God.

'Cause when you think about it, what else does an Omnipresent, Omnipotent, and Omniscient have on its ToDo list? Why not mix things up a little? And how fun would the games be if we could remember that it was all just pretend? It's so much more interesting if we think it's real. When kids are playing pretend and their character dies, it's not that big of a deal. They just create a new character and come back into the game. Even the bad guys just make the game more fun by adding drama and contrast.

Yeah, of course there's probably much more to the story of Life than that, but I figure I'll have plenty of time to get all that worked out later. Probably MUCH later. For now, I like this. It makes sense to me -- it feels light and playful, and makes me happy to be alive.

I was never big on traditional religion because it just didn't make sense to my heart that some people could be so very right and others so completely wrong about something as important as ETERNITY.

I couldn't get behind a God that actually cared if I ate meat on a Friday. Does he really not have better things to do?

But this -- the idea that we are all Godbits playing in the physical realm just for the fun of it, just for the experience of exanding our Self in new ways -- this, I can get behind. This God does not care who ate meat and who took his name in vain, it's all just part of the fun of experiencing Itself in myriad forms and combinations and permutations. This God has no need to judge. This God, well .... this God kinda sounds like pure Love.

elevator speech

During a walk with my friend Patrick yesterday, the conversation turned to elevator speeches. Those are the marketing tool that you prepare to describe and promote your business in 30 seconds or less - approximately the amount of time you'd have to interact with a stranger in an elevator.

During coach training, we were advised to come up with a quick and pithy description of our coaching services. Even though there are lots of good formulas to help with this, I never had much luck with it. I'd create nice little scripts, but could never remember them later. Patrick suggested something I like so much better:

Just show up in the present moment, pay full attention to the person you are talking to, and trust that if they ask you what you do, the answer that arises naturally will be good enough.

Part of my resistance to the elevator speech concept was that retrieving my prepared script from of my memory banks took a lot of effort, and diverted my attention from the other person. I also hated feeling like I was reciting something that was out of context ... static, rather than dynamic ... dead, rather than alive and growing.

Skilled marketers would probably say that my blurb must have needed some fine-tuning, and that's certainly true! But maybe it's even truer that I'm just not a pre-scripted person.

It's nice to have faith that the fresh content springing from mind to mouth in the moment is adequate enough. Being spontaneously authentic might even be a better way to help folks who are looking for what we have to offer to recognize us when they find us.

techniques for being in the moment

this page is amazing. it teaches simple, quick and powerful techniques that change your inner experience immediately. I'm especially intrigued at their contention that projecting any energy, even love, toward someone is manipulative and draining for the sender. It's a fascinating read.
http://www.kenpage.com/healingtechniques/moment.html

grains of knowledge

check this site out. it expands your vocabulary and donates rice at the same time. what a concept!
http://freerice.com/index.php

ACIM

About ten years ago, I was in a weekly Course in Miracles study group at Unity of Boulder, and I absolutely thrived on the new experience of being able to discuss such radical ideas with other like-minded people. About half way through the year-long course, my interest petered out. Which was fine with me -- I just figured I had gotten what I needed for the moment, and lots of the principles had become part of my inner landscape. I happily moved on to other studies, and thankfully there are now gobs of people in my life with whom I can discuss radical ideas til the cows come home.

Recently, I've felt myself being drawn back to the Course. The same barriers that had prohibited me from embracing it fully back then were still present; the Christian lexicon, a masculine God, etc. But I found myself feeling very determined to figure out a way to access this material that would work for me. And then I came across the transcriptions of Ken Wapnick's lectures at http://www.facim.org/acim/ex-series.htm. Voila! It was much easier for me to understand the meaning without getting hung up on the form.

So here are a few quotes from Ken that I really enjoyed:

My failure to understand what love is does not change love. My attacks on love do not change love. Love simply waits patiently within my mind until I return to it.
~
The example is very helpful to remember as well when we find ourselves tempted to tell people the "truth" and hit them over the head with it. Rather, what we want to do is love them. We do not want to hit them over the head with the "truth," which is always form. Love is never form. Truth is never form -- it is content. It is expressed in form, but the form is not the love. Whether I am teaching you directly what A Course in Miracles is saying or I am going shopping with you, knowing full well what the meaning of the shopping is for you, if love is in my heart, that is the message that you will receive. And that is the message that I will be offering. I can only do that if I first join with love in my own mind.
~
Again, we are not asked to deny what we see. We are simply asked to put everything into one of two categories -- either an expression of love or a call for love.

tips for helping kids who are non-traditional learners

there is some amazing content here. wish I would have seen this years ago, when my kids were in elementary school ...
http://www.diannecraft.org/tutoringinstructions.html

common sense and science

here's what's been fascinating me lately:

Mellen-Thomas Benedict was dead for 90 minutes, and had quite an experience before he came back. Very profound stuff - hopeful and empowering:
http://www.mellen-thomas.com/index.html

German New Medicine: The theory that illness in the body is actually an adaptive response to a stress conflict makes deeply good sense to me, and changes everything in terms of intervention.
http://germannewmedicine.ca/documents/welcome.html

Primary Perception: My life changed dramatically when I read The Secret Life of Plants years ago and learned that scientists had proven that plants and bacteria respond to our intention. Cleve Backster was apparently behind this research, and has his own site:
http://www.primaryperception.com/bio/

notes to a parent

Just came from a parenting consultation home visit. As I was summarizing some key points from our session to email to her, it occurred to me that even though it's out of context, maybe other parents might benefit from reading it. So here it is:

- It's okay for you to have needs!! Needs are part of the human experience.

(In our Connected Parenting classes, we teach the ABC's of Five Core Needs: Autonomy, Basic Essentials like food, water and safety, Connection, Contribution, and Creativity.)

We all get snarky when we go too long without getting these core needs met, and then we aren't the kind of parent, spouse or friend that we want to be. Therefore, consider yourself Permitted to find ways to meet those needs! (And there are plenty of ways to take care of yourself without compromising your values as a parent, so it's not an All or Nothing situation. There's quite a range of possibilities between having baby in bed with you and letting baby cry it out alone for hours.)

- Parents are giving their children a powerful gift when they acknowledge their own human needs, as well as their children's, with neutral matter-of-fact acceptance, rather than hiding them because they seem like weaknesses. Modeling has a greater impact than anything else we do as parents. It's wonderful for our kids to experience the joy and connection that happens while we brainstorm creative ways for both parties to get their needs met. That's a major life skill that will serve them well.

- Baby steps! Big changes can happen in small increments. When you want to make a change or try a new experiment, it's okay to take it slow. Look for the smallest possible step, one that is so small that it almost doesn't even register on your radar screen as a change. A step that makes you say, Sure, no problem! I can do that easily!! For example, if you want to help the baby start learning to soothe himself a bit, wait just 3 seconds longer than you usually do before going to him when he starts fussing. Try it out, and see how it goes.

When it feels like you are ready for more, look for the next smallest possible adjustment and make that one. Maybe try waiting 4 seconds. And continue on in this effortless way until you are where you want to be.

My friend has a needlepoint on her kitchen wall of a saying that's been in her family for generations: Yard by yard, life is hard. Inch by inch, it's a cinch! I find it strangely comforting in a cheesy sort of way.

- Work your way up to full contact. Start with the smallest intervention when wanting to soothe your child. Rather than immediately picking him up when he fusses a bit, first try talking or singing, moving yourself within view so he can see you, looking into his eyes and smiling, a gentle touch, and rubbing his back or feet or head. And then go right ahead and pick him up if none of that has helped to soothe him. Being present for our children in these progressive steps is a wonderful way to foster healthy attachment - your child experiences you as available, attentive, and responsive, and he also gets the opportunity to gently expand his self-soothing abilities.

- Remember to breathe deeply. Allow yourself at least one calming deep breath before taking a soothing action for your child. Actions are more effective when they spring from a place of inner alignment. (and oxygenation!)

- It's all yoga. Kids bring us to our edges every day. Parenting is the ultimate asana! When we are at our edge emotionally or mentally -- the place where we think we can't stand it a second longer -- we don't always have to run away. Sometimes we can stay there and breathe a bit, and we may find we can go a little deeper, or we may decide to retreat. Either choice is okay. It's the deep breath that allows us to decide rather than react.

- You are the expert on your child. No author, professor, therapist, or consultant can trump what you know about yourself and your children. Consider what you hear or read and see if it resonates with your own inner guidance and intuition. If it makes it through that filter, then experiment with it. If it is not effective, or the price you or your child pay feels too high, then pitch it out and try something else.


I hope this has been helpful! I work with parents all over the country via telephone consultations, so please keep me in mind if you know a parent who is seeking some assistance. There's more information on my website: www.karenalonge.com


warmly,
karen

more quotes I like from alan cohen

Those who love you are not fooled by mistakes you make or dark images you hold about yourself and even defend. They remember your beauty when you feel ugly; your wholeness when you are broken; your innocence when you feel guilty; and your purpose when you are confused.



All limits exist only in the mind, and it is only in the mind that they can be overcome.

All of your errors have not built a wall against your success. They have paved your way to it.

Anything good for you brings out the best in you and does not force you to make believe you are something you are not.

At any moment you have two voices in our head: one that tells you that you can’t, and another that tells you that you can. Which will prove true? The one you give the most attention to. The one you act on. The one you make a stand for.

No matter what has happened, let today be new.

Outlandish ideas move the world ahead far more powerfully than logical steps. An outrageous imagination is ultimately the most practical contribution.

Preparing to live is not living. Don’t miss this moment ― it’s all you ever dreamed of.

Somehow it all works out.

The quality of your life equals the ratio of appreciation to complaint.

lots more here:

http://www.alancohen.com/Quotes/quotesbyalancohen1.htm

relationship life preservers

I just finished writing a marathon email to a friend whose husband has more or less checked out of their marriage and is ignoring her. I wanted to share it with you, too, in case it resonates with anyone.

~

Now that I'm back at my computer and thinking clearly, I wanted to share one more relationship idea. It's radical, and you may feel kinda repulsed by it, so I'll just throw it out there trusting that you will either pitch it out or experiment with it as you see fit.

I guess it's based on a few premises which might seem really silly when you first hear them. Even if they sound like crap, it might be worth an experiment. At the risk of dangerous oversimplification, I'll try to describe them briefly.

Most men need a mission in life. They are wired to feel good when they make a difference or accomplish something. When they feel aimless or useless for whatever reason, and that reason might have nothing at all to do with their relationship, they can sort of implode into depression.

This might sound really stupid, but I haven't yet met a man who did not thrive on feeling like his woman's hero. Of course that has nothing to do with income, competence, or anything material. It's emotional. They want to know that they have something unique and powerful to offer to their lover. And they do, or we would not have chosen them. Sometimes they need to be reminded about what that is when they have lost sight of it.

The woman who loves him can sometimes offer a temporary lifeline into feeling like a hero again with two strategies: speaking only gratitude, and asking for their help.

These are sort of "medicinal" strategies; applied in specific doses to support a healing from within. You are right that we cannot truly bring anyone out of depression or change them.

These are just life preserver rings that we throw out into the water. We feel better having something to try, and he may just grab hold of one and pull himself to the side of the boat.

So the life preservers might look like this: when he gets home, the first thing he hears is that you are happy to see him. If that's not even true at this point, then maybe it's true that your daughter is happy to see him, so you say that with sincerity.

Then you might ask for his help on something for dinner. The request is really straightforward. "Honey, will you mash those potatoes for me?" If he does it, great. You don't help him or make suggestions or comments, even if he does it completely wrong.

When he's done, you say a warm and simple thank you. All the better if it is accompanied by a kiss, a gentle touch on the shoulder, or at least eye contact.

If he doesn't do it, that's fine too. You were planning on doing it yourself anyway, so you just take care of it.

The rest of the night goes this way. Mostly gratitude and appreciative comments, sprinkled with an occasional request, which is offered in complete neutrality only one time. If he does it, he hears more gratitude. If not, you just do it with no comment.

If you honestly can't find one thing to appreciate, then don't say anything until you can. If you have to dig, you could look for something he did around the house back when he was feeling good, like, "Wow, I feel so lucky to have this terrific deck that you made for us,"or whatever.

The whole time you are taking care of yourself emotionally, listening to yourself, acknowledging your feelings internally, and doing whatever it takes to unilaterally calm your own anxiety or anger. When you need to vent some steam, do it with girlfriends.

A few days of this might help him to let his guard down a little bit and show some vulnerability or emotion. If he does, you'll want to meet his disclosures with as much understanding as you can. One way to do that is to simply repeat what you think he is expressing back to him, and wait for his confirmation, and ask if there's more. Then ask if you can share your feelings about it before doing so.

Even if he does not open or soften, it might be good medicine for you, anyway. We always feel better when we focus our attention on finding things to appreciate, and it takes our minds off of noticing what is so painfully wrong.

Yes, it can take a LOT of discipline to do this. And if I know only one thing about you it's that you are a powerful woman! Even if all you can muster is one appreciative comment in an evening of otherwise gentle and accepting silence, it's still something.

so anyway, sorry, that was pretty long. I'll shut up now and just say that I am wishing you both all the best.



Karen Alonge
720 771 8915
www.karenalonge.com
Contact me to schedule a parenting consultation by phone,
or to register for Connected Parenting classes near Boulder, CO.

bedtime prayer

Not many people know that I was raised Catholic. Liberal Catholic, with guitar masses and really hip religious education. One time we spent the whole class listening to Barry Manilow's song The Miracle is YOU! and talking about what miracles we all are. It was pretty cool.

My mom did everything about religion right, in my opinion. She never forced us to go to church, but she went every Sunday, and I usually tagged along because she was all dressed up and smelled so nice and I wanted to be with her. These days, even though I no longer practice any religion, I still think we are all miracles. And I still remember dozens of songs from those guitar masses, and find comfort in them.

So when I found myself writing to a religious friend whose father had recently passed away that I would keep his family in my prayers, I had a brief moment of consternation. 'Wait a second," I thought, "I don't pray!" And I don't, not in the traditional sort of way. I guess it's just sort of shorthand for saying, "I'll be thinking fondly and supportively of you guys, and sending extra love and attention your way."

This whole line of thought incited a flashback to the bedtime prayer that we said every night when we were kids. I think I was in my late 20's before I realized that my mom had done some serious editing of the original. She was WAY ahead of her time, (still is, in fact!) and when I remembered this today I was stunned at the depth of insight and understanding that she expressed so beautifully. She blessed our little beings every night for years by sending us off to sleep with visions of optimism, service, and gratitude dancing in our heads. I want to share it with you all because it's just too good to die off with the three of us. Mom, you are amazing!

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.

When in the morning light I wake,
Show me the path of love to take.

God bless Mommy and Daddy,
God bless Karen, CJ, and Paul,
God bless all our friends and relatives.

Thank you for a very nice day.

raindrops keep falling on my head

from www.dailyOM.com:

When we simply allow ourselves to fully feel our feelings as they come, we tend to let them go easily. This is all we are required to do; our feelings simply want to be felt. We often complicate the situation by applying mental energy in the form of analysis, when all we really need is to allow, as the earth allows the rain to fall upon it. As the rain falls, the earth responds in a multitude of ways, sometimes emptying out to form a great canyon, sometimes soaking it up to nourish an infinitude of plants. In the same way, the deeper purpose of our feelings is to transform the terrain of our inner world, sometimes creating space for more feelings to flow, sometimes providing sustenance for growth. All we need to do is allow the process by relaxing, opening, and receiving the bounty of our emotions.

Connected Parenting class info

You've heard me talk enthusiatically about creating a new parenting model with my colleague Robin. Here are the details:

Connected Parenting

This comprehensive five week course gives parents concrete tools for identifying and addressing the dynamics that motivate behavior, including development, temperament and needs. Learn how to apply our three-step problem solving process to neutralize emotional outbursts and transform power struggles into problem-solving opportunities.

Instructors Robin Goldstein-Lincoln MA, LPC, and Karen Alonge have over 30 years combined experience educating and counseling parents, and have synthesized the most effective tools and concepts into their own parenting model.

Several classes for parents of teens, school age children, and young children will begin this fall in the Boulder area. For more information please visit www.karenalonge.com/classes.html

If you've already taken one of our classes, you might be interested in our Connected Parents Resource Group (CPRG), which we offer to provide ongoing information and support to parents.

Come to discuss more about child development, temperament and underlying needs as they relate to generating win-win solutions.

The group for parents of children meets in South Boulder
on the first Sunday of each month from 11:30 am - 12:45 pm.

The group for parents of teens meets in South Boulder
on the first Sunday of each month from 1:00 pm - 2:15 pm.

Drop-ins are welcome. Cost is $20.

Please confirm with us by phone or email by Thursday
of that week if you plan to attend.

Contact us for the location.

Robin: (303) 818 7086
robinglincoln@msn.com

Karen: (720) 771 8915
karen@karenalonge.com

That's all for now!
Soon we hope to teach these classes by teleclass as well, so let me know if you are interested.
:)

that's why

I just got back from a lovely family reunion on the Gulf Beaches of Florida.
I still feel as relaxed as jello ... the sun, the sand, the good company ... so wonderful.

oh, and I even got shat on by a big ol pelican! rumor has it that's good luck.
LOL. uh huh. hope so. that stuff was tough to get out of my purse.

anyway, when I got home I caught up on my friend debra's blog and found this gem:
***
You are not on earth to make things happen. You are not on earth to spread the love. You are not on earth to make it a better place or to learn acceptance of the things you cannot change. You are not on earth to find your soul mate or your purpose. You are not on earth to put the needs of others before your own. And you are most certainly not on earth to suffer, pay penance, be tested, or judged.

Did I leave anything out?

You are on earth because in your loftiest state of being, perched high above the wonderment, at the pinnacle of your glory, you wondered what it would be like, even fleetingly, to believe in limits.

You sage
-The Universe

Thoughts become things... choose the good ones!®
© http://www.tut.com/ ®
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
And when you can grasp this from within the illusions, you will also grasp how unlimited you truly are. (And we'll probably never hear the end of it...)
***
here's what I say to that: YEE HAW!!!! I love it.
I struggled for years to make sense of that whole "Life is a school" philosophy. Finally I gave up and decided maybe life was actually the playground!

How would you live if your experience was simply a gift to the Creator, rather than a lesson, a growth opportunity, or a test?

ps: If you like this message, check out www.tut.com for a free subscription to daily love notes from the universe. cool stuff there.

attitude is contagious

this is a great little youtube clip which demonstrates in a measurable way the impact that positive thoughts in our own minds have on ourselves and those around us.

there are two parts, so be sure to click on part 2 after part 1 ends.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BLVFcVGv2MY

EFT video

a 7 minute intro to EFT, a healing modality which I use regularly on my clients and myself with great success. Anyone can learn it for free. It's painless, quick, and effective. And did I mention free? check this out:
http://www.emofree.com/splash/video_popup.html

an easy way to improve your relationship

ooh, I couldn't have said this better myself, so I'll just send you over to Susan Page for a very quick read. Although this author writes and teaches about adult relationships, I found this posted on a parenting site because much of her advice works in that context, too.

http://www.parentingbookmark.com/pages/SPage03.htm

dynamics of illness and health

this fantastic article, written by an MD, explains the mind/body connection in the clearest terms I've ever seen.

http://www.emofree.com/Articles2/emotional-healing-robins.htm

automated reminders

I often get so mentally focused on writing or researching that I remain immobile in front of my computer screen for hours. So I am grinning at the irony of the new free software I just downloaded, which automatically flashes a reminder message on my screen at intervals I select. I wrote my own messages, which say things like look out the window, get up and stretch, take a drink of water, etc. Yes, I still have to look at the screen to see the reminder, but since that's what I'm doing anyway, it works! just going with the flow here ... starting where I am. :)

http://www.motivator.ws/motivator/default.aspx?sj=true

insightful article on The Secret

http://www.themastersofthesecret.com/letter/

carnival of deliberate creation

visit here to find links to lots of cool blog entries about the Law of Attraction ... including mine! :)

http://www.optimistlab.com/index.php/2007/03/21/the-carnival-of-deliberate-creation-2-perspectives/

the science behind the law of attraction

thanks to my friend chari for passing this along to me. sorry about all the >> ... I'm just not in the mood to go through line by line and remove them. :)

I can't vouch for the scientific validity of these studies, and they make some bold claims that I would probably not be comfortable making based on these results, but I thought it was interesting reading nonetheless.


Energy Research Corp. has developed
>> a product they believe can effect (heal), even to the cellular level,
>> with no physical contact. It is based on quantum energy. The results
>> of their beta test with 600 volunteers over 8 months is astonishing.
>> *Understanding a Secret of the Universe*
>> Below are three astonishing experiments with DNA which proves that
>> DNA can heal itself according to the "feelings" of the individual as
>> reported recently by Gregg Braden. In his recent program entitled
>> Healing Hearts/Healing Nations: The Science of Peace and the Power of
>> Prayer, Gregg Braden discussed how in the past we lost huge amounts
>> of information from ancient spiritual traditions (when the library at
>> Alexandria burned we lost at least 532,000 documents), and that there
>> may be information in those traditions which could help us understand
>> some of the mysteries of science. To this end he reported on three
>> very interesting experiments. Gregg Braden started off as a scientist
>> and engineer, before he began pursuing these larger questions.
>>
>> *EXPERIMENT #1*
>>
>> The first experiment reported was done by Dr.Vladimir Poponin, a
>> quantum biologist. In this experiment, first a container was emptied
>> (i.e. a vacuum was created within it), and then the only thing left
>> photons (particles of light) they measured the distribution (ie the
>> location) of the photons and found they were completely random inside
>> the container. This was the expected result.
>>
>> Then some DNA was placed inside the container and the distribution
>> (location) of the photons was remeasured. This time the photons were
>> LINED UP in an ORDERED way and aligned with the DNA. In other words
>> the physical DNA had an effect on the non- physical photons.
>>
>> After that, the DNA was removed from the container, and the
>> distribution of the photons was measured again. The photons REMAINED
>> ORDERED and lined up where the DNA had been. What are the light
>> particles connected to?
>>
>> Gregg Braden says we are forced to accept the possibility that some
>> NEW field of energy, a web of energy, is there and the DNA is
>> communicating with the photons through this energy.
>>
>> *EXPERIMENT #2*
>>
>> These were experiments done by the military. Leukocytes (white blood
>> cells) were collected for DNA from donors and placed into chambers so
>> they could measure electrical changes. In this experiment, the donor
>> was placed in one room and subjected to "emotional stimulation"
>> consisting of video clips, which generated different emotions in the
>> donor. The DNA was placed in a different room in the same building.
>> Both the donor and his DNA were monitored and as the donor exhibited
>> emotional peaks or valleys (measured by electrical responses), the
>> DNA exhibited the IDENTICAL RESPONSES AT THE EXACT SAME TIME. There
>> was no lag time, no transmission time. The DNA peaks and valleys
>> EXACTLY MATCHED the peaks and valleys of the donor in time.
>>
>> The military wanted to see how far away they could separate the donor
>> from his DNA and still get this effect. They stopped testing after
>> they separated the DNA and the donor by 50 miles and STILL had the
>> SAME result. No lag time; no transmission time.
>>
>> The DNA and the donor had the same identical responses in time. What
>> can this mean? Gregg Braden says it means that living cells
>> communicate through a previously unrecognized form of energy. This
>> energy is not affected by time and distance. This is a non- local
>> form of energy, an energy that already exists everywhere, all the time.
>>
>> *EXPERIMENT #3*
>>
>> The third experiment was done by the Institute of Heart Math and the
>> paper that was written about this was titled: Local and Non local
>> Effects of Coherent Heart Frequencies on Conformational Changes of
>> DNA. (Disregard the title! The info is incredible.)
>>
>> This is the experiment that relates directly to the anthrax
>> situation. In this experiment, some human placenta DNA (the most
>> pristine form of DNA) was placed in a container from which they could
>> measure changes in the DNA. Twenty-eight vials of DNA were given (one
>> each) to 28 trained researchers. Each researcher had been trained how
>> to generate and FEEL feelings, and they each had strong emotions.
>>
>> What was discovered was that the DNA CHANGED ITS SHAPE according to
>> the feelings of the researchers:
>> 1. When the researchers FELT gratitude, love and appreciation, the
>> DNA responded by RELAXING and the strands unwound. The length of the
>> DNA became longer.
>>
>> 2. When the researchers FELT anger, fear, frustration, or stress, the
>> DNA responded by TIGHTENING UP. It became shorter and SWITCHED OFF
>> many of our DNA codes! If you've ever felt "shut down" by negative
>> emotions, now you know why your body was equally shut down too. The
>> shut down of the DNA codes was reversed and the codes were switched
>> back on again when feelings of love, joy, gratitude and appreciation
>> were felt by the researchers.
>>
>> This experiment was later followed up by testing HIV positive
>> patients. They discovered that feelings of love, gratitude and
>> appreciation created 300,000 TIMES the RESISTANCE they had without
>> those feelings. So here's the answer to what can help you stay well,
>> no matter what dreadful virus or bacteria may be floating around.
>> Stay in feelings of joy, love, gratitude and appreciation!
>>
>> These emotional changes went beyond the effects of electro-
>> magnetics. Individuals trained in deep love were able to change the
>> shape of their DNA. Gregg Braden says this illustrates a new
>> recognized form of energy that connects all of creation. This energy
>> appears to be a TIGHTLY WOVEN WEB that connects all matter.
>> Essentially we're able to influence this web of creation through our
>> VIBRATION.
>>
>> *SUMMARY:* What do the results of these experiments have to do with
>> our present situation? This is the science behind how we can choose a
>> timeline to stay safe, no matter what else is happening. As Gregg
>> explains in The Isaiah Effect, basically time is not just linear
>> (past, present and future), but it also has depth. The depth of time
>> consists of all the possible prayers and timelines that could ever be
>> prayed or exist. Essentially, all our prayers have already been
>> answered. We just activate the one we're living through our FEELINGS.
>>
>> THIS is how we create our reality - by choosing it with our feelings.
>> Our feelings are activating the timeline via the web of creation,
>> which connects all of the energy and matter of the Universe.
>>
>> Remember that the law of the Universe is that we attract what we
>> focus on. If you are focused on fearing whatever may come, you are
>> sending a strong message to the Universe to send you whatever you
>> fear. Instead if you can get yourself into feelings of joy, love,
>> appreciation or gratitude, and focus on bringing more of that into
>> your life, you are going to avoid the negative stuff automatically.
>>
>> You will be choosing a different TIMELINE with your feelings. You can
>> prevent getting anthrax or any other flu, virus, etc, by staying in
>> these positive feelings, which maintains an incredibly strong immune
>> system. So here's your protection for whatever comes: Find something
>> to be happy about every day, and every hour if possible,moment-to-
>> moment, even if only for a few minutes. This is the easiest and best
>> protection you can have. If nothing else, be joyous that the
>> criminals have "already been caught" by the Universe!

write locally, be read globally

I'm delighted about being featured in a blog carnival about miracles, which is hosted by a fellow blogger in India:
http://letthesunshinein.wordpress.com/2007/03/11/the-carnival-of-miracles-edition-2/

I'm also in the Carnival of Family Life this week:
http://stkappleto.blogspot.com/2007/03/carnival-of-family-life-45.html

:)karen

www.karenalonge.com

mom's bloggin

gee, this is a neat idea .... a blog party full of interesting stuff by and for moms.
http://www.5minutesformom.com/

If you came over from the party, I'm a parenting consultant. Click on the 'parenting' label below this post to read my parenting advice.

and please feel free to contact me for a free 15 minute conversation - I offer parenting consultations by phone, email, and will even come to your home if you live near Boulder, CO.

come to think of it, I'll come to your home if you live in Hawaii too, if you pay travel expenses! [tee hee hee. No, seriously, I will! or anyplace else that's warm and sunny. It's been a looong winter here.]

:)k

www.karenalonge.com
720 771 8915